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Release the Gremlins : Sorcery, casting cost of X generic, X generic, and one red mana

You use Wrenns -3 ability to make a 5/5, use that 5/5 to crew the Chariot, and then use the Chariots ability to make another 5/5 during combat

And unlike Blood Artist and such, these triggers can be directed at a number of places, such as planeswalkers, creatures, or at someone's face

Mordenkainen Mordenkainen is a planeswalker whose ultimate ability switches your hand with your library and gives you an emblem that lifts your max hand size restriction

That said, most of the Near Mint listings for this card at time of writing undercut its supposed Market Price, so Magikarp might be plummeting back to the sea shortly